Dec 8 I have been slacking off on writing. I promised to find happy beautiful thoughts, but I have been to distracted and lazy to write them down. Time to start again. TODAY, Good morning my love, wake up little men, rise and shine to the fresh clear blue sky, kittens rustling about, soft puppy kisses, the rewards of mounds of laundry washed and folded , running outside with the warm sun gently hugging my cold skin, closing my eyes and breathing long and deep, thankful for the clean air and smell of pine trees and burning wood fires, in the company of a dear friend precious friend.The feel of soft pizza dough squishy and lovely in my palms. Packing for a weekend in the city. Calm and content,yet ready to have some wine, just because its nice. It has been a good day.

November 26 We have enjoyed a few relaxing days filled with food,friends, lingering in pajamas cocktails peacefully lounging in our hands. today I was ready for a change, perhaps a jaunt into town, farmers market, a movie just a change of pace. Well day wasn't very far into our morning and my wish was realized. Yesterday, after weeks of pondering the american epidemic of childhood obesity, I took the plunge, a financial investment to ward off the trend of little american fat children sitting in front of tv. Kmart held the answer to relieve my worrying mind, a trampoline complete with the safety net. The safety net of course relieves all parents from any guilt,from dismembered children,to skulls crashing at high speeds into each other, the safety net is all you need. It keeps children safely bouncing their happy, healthy,hyper little selves while the parents cheer them off, happy they are keeping them safe from all the obesity related diseases of their lazy little chubby neighbor kids. So as I was frying up the bacon and pancakes this morning ( we can eat that way, we have a trampoline now) I heard the horrific scream that spelled trouble. There was brock, laying helplessly in the confines of the safety net, screaming and wailing, jimmie and sean kneeling above him. The dilemma, emergency room or not? He lays there, big brown eyes, streaming with tears. Flashbacks. Prior hospital visits, its a gamble. the rooster that attacked cole, the time tristan was told " whatever you do, don't touch the thing that looks exactly like a gun, the house sprayer full of stain, please don't pick it up and shoot your broth directly in the face with it!" The bunk bed incident when jens gramma asked" meha aren't you afraid the children will fall off that ladder?" Me " no they go up and down all the t..." BOOM! Broken elbow , Always the dilemma, if I don't respond quickly enough to the emergency room I risk life long guilt if in fact there is an injury which transforms my perfect healthy child into a drooling paraplegic, then theres the other choice, run off to the emergency room, only to find the child is perfectly fine, a very dramatic academy award winning star of screaming , which calms once you are in that little room where they close the curtain. Once your behind the curtain, it feels like your committed. suddenly the reality sets in, and everything in the room is transformed into dollar bills which you picture floating away from you fast and furious. But they have closed the curtain, theres no turning back, if you try to make a run for it, you look like a negligent parent, and if they take your kid it could cost more in lawyer fees to get your child back, so not that your hoping the five thousand dollar x rays will reveal bones crushed to oblivion, but in some way your hoping at least they find something wrong so you don't feel like such a moron who just loves throwing your money away at the ER. Well this time this is how it went for us, he was completely healthy and fine and we are left with a very expensive bill. So it goes. I am sure he loved the doting attention, and maybe he needed a little one on one time with his folks anyhow, and thats a sure fire way to get it. The next time I am faced with this dilemma, they will have to suffer and scream just a wee bit longer.

Nov. 21 Something wonderful about today... After recovering quickly from a bout of sickness,( thanks to apple cider vinegar, my favorite cure of the month) I invited our dear friends Chris and kate and Chris's polish parents, Nina and walter for dinner. For years we have dined with chris and kate under many circumstances,and I am as comfy with them in my pajamas as I am in a formal gown. But tonight I was entertaining the folks, so I intended on having the table set, me showered, dinner perfect. You see, cute Walter comes dressed always in a suit, tie, even a hat, so the least I thought I could do was be showered , brush my teethe,maybe some lipstick. Well sometimes the best laid plans, don't pan out. As it turned out my time line was off today and when they arrived they found me in my sweats in the kitchen , hair like I was fighting the dust storm of the century, covered head to toe in flour. You see , my menu was a butternut squash, walnut lasagna. The big wrench in my plan was I decided to make the pasta from scratch. The cool thing is my wrench turned out to be the highlight of my day. Although I had pictured everything neat and perfectly waiting for my guests when they arrived ,they walked into this dust storm of flour and oil and commotion, but after stepping aside from it all to mix a few cocktails we all joined in the pasta making event. Turned out to be a really fun communal event. Different than I had imagined in my martha stewart fantasies, but far more fun, I am sure. Yes I have way more fun than Martha , and I have never been to Prison, yet. So the beauty in my day was that even when things aren't as they are planned, just roll with it, just like our pasta which at first, seemed to not be working, it took many tries, to get the round gooey ball to transform into something soft and delicate and tasteful after just rolling with it, it totally transformed, into something better than we had hoped for. It turned out to be an excellent evening filled with the warmth of good friends, the aromas of roasted butternut,squash raviolis, the tart tanginess of sour lemon drops that lightened everything in the room, filling my heart with a happy ,blessed ,memory to add to my chamber of memories, to recall on those gloomy days ,when you just need to think back to something nice... Thats my happy thing today.

INDIA.... Well ok Yuba CIty

So after conotemplating whether i could find enough interest in ordinary life to continue my blog while at home I finally had enough inspiration to say.YES. Inspiration can come when you least expect it and from the least places you would expect. After having the privledge of traveling through europe for two monthes and the joy that came from recording our experiences in a blog, I didnt think I could find enough interesting things to write about. But since I came home, I realised how much writing gave me. It was such a rewarding and relaxing experience for me and I have truly missed it. The idea that simple words recorded on paper or on my handy ipad can preserve memories, call me back to times and places that are sometimes beautiful, sometimes sad, happy, extrodinary,that these letters if carefully placed can capture in time the smells the thoughts emotions ,the things that make life interesting. I have had the idea that even though I am back home leading my ordinary life perhaps, I can carry on this notion to find something beautiful or funny or even sad and record it and maybe it can make someone laugh or feel good or even feel not alone. So here I go again.
So as I was saying today we were in yuba city california. This may be one of californias least exciting ,at least so I thought. Tonight though changed my mind. Some friends invited us to dinner at an indian resraunt. I have never really had indian food before. the first thing that impressed me was the atmosphere of the place. I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the decor for being in such an undecorated town like yuba city. As we sat and enjoyed our drinks with friends and the food started to come, I was blown away by the exploding flavors. Little bites of fish covered in perfectly balnced spices, sambosas? i think thats what they were called with this amazing sauce, then the spicy curries and naan bread. I mean I really love food, but this was like nothing I have had before, It was like each bit made music in my mouth and touched my soul. Not just any music, good music, the equivelant of aretha franklin on a plate. The real inspiration came though when I went to to the bathroom. No it wasnt the toilet. It was that there was a party going on in the room by the bsthrooms.This place was filled with indian people, and I am afraid to say it, but living in the whitest county in california I notice anyone well, not white. I have never been to an indian party before, but what I witnessed was truly beautiful,colorfull,lovely on every level. The women adorned in their colorful gowns with nose rings,and dancing away. As I stared like a kid with no money into a candy store, this nice man with a cool turban, summoned me in" come in you can join us! dance!" So i grabbed my little 7 year dance partner and pounded my feet to the sound of citar, surrounded by new sounds and smells and colors and I absolutely loved it! I have met many travelors who say india is there favorite place to visit, and one night in and indian restraunt in yubs city and I am sold. After the,little bit of traveling we did last summer I am hungry for the excitment of new. This seems like a wonderful culture I would love to learn more about. So the next time I pass by a guy in a big turban I am gonna give him the widest smile and try to chat.
So thats what I found beautiful for today.Hope I conveyed it well enough .